Damn you Hamas—Damn You!

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Jul 302014
 

Damn you Hamas—Damn You!

An op-ed by the Tiny Minority of Pro-Israel Supporters

@Theokranews

Israeli supporters 2As we head into the third week of a poor man’s intifada, one cannot avoid the violence and pools of blood that blemish the roads and hilltops throughout this beautiful region. We have witnessed children killed, families separated and the horror of bombs dropped every 10 minutes. We constantly look at the sky and then seek shelter. We pray to the end of the destruction and the agony of those who have been inflicted by pain from all the suffering. Most importantly we say with courage to the people from the Light unto Nations—stay strong. And damn you Hamas.

Hamas you have made things so tough for Israel. We sit here and loathe the day you ever took control of Gaza through an official Palestinian legislative election in which you received 440,000 votes, nearly 44% of the constituency. Yes, we know it’s official. But you’re not getting a fruit basket from us. Were we surprised when you removed the declaration of wiping Israel from the map in your new manifesto which completely nullified the very same statement in the preamble to your 1988 charter? Yes! There was more of a chance for LeBron James to play in the WNBA than for you to make such a bold and positive change. But then you had the balls to take your rage one step further in 2012 and work with Fatah to squash your differences.  Was this an attempt to become more legitimate and to start a new chapter of dialogue? Maybe. But it’s not going to happen because we won’t let it. There is no need for a talk when it is a scientific fact your organization is comprised of terrorists.

Don’t think your change in attitude will fool us. You deserve the economic blockade imposed on you since you were sworn into office even though we kind of figured just about everyone in Gaza is not associated with Hamas. There’s not a gallon of milk you can purchase for kids in school that will allow us to overlook your malevolent actions. Your limited movement from one fence line to the next and inspections at checkpoints for anyone under 50 is a testament to the safety we maintain for the Palestinian people. If they can’t go anywhere than we know they are secure. We make sure that all goods are inspected before they proceed into Gaza. All infrastructure, gas and electricity are minimal. I mean how much do you really need anyways? And while the United Nations, the United Nations Human Rights Council, The Red Cross, Desmond Tutu, Russell Brand, Penelope Cruz, John Cusack, Chuck D and John Legend consider this blockade a collective punishment and illegal, just remember, ‘flotilla’ rhymes with ‘vanilla’ and earns you 11 points in Scrabble.

israeli owl

Baatz blames his pain and anguish on Hamas

We show compassion time and time again. When your hand-rolled $800 missiles that look more like bottle rockets come into Israel but are shot down by our $180 million Iron Dome System (thank you Detroit!), we show no animosity.  Before we invade Gaza, we demonstrate the decency by providing leaflets which warn Palestinians to evacuate the area before we annihilate the homes they will never see again. We even drop smaller bombs before the bigger ones just to let them get a small taste of what’s really coming. But when a long-eared owl by the name of Baatz gets injured from a delayed mortar attack in Nirim and has to be rushed to an animal hospital to save it from dying, there is no compassion. How dare you speak of the occupation, the atrocities and the 1000 civilians’ deaths in Gaza this past month when an innocent owl was seriously injured?! Luckily Baatz is now in stable condition and has the best doctors in the world tending to his needs. But what if he hadn’t survived? Could you live with yourself Hamas to have the blood of an Israeli owl on your hands? Could you deal with the pain and suffering of Baatz? I think not.

As a minority of ardent supporters who love shwarmas and Chuck Norris, we are committed to protecting Israel and advocating that the only peace is a one-sided solution in which we ask the questions and you give the reply. So please stop Hamas—it’s making the situation dire. While your popularity rises as Israel’s blatant control of the Palestinian National Authority becomes more evident, you cannot win the world over. As soundtrack king Kenny Loggins and ex-front man falsetto God Steve Perry sang together in the summer of 1983, “Don’t fight it—it’ll do your heart no good.” Listen to them—they divinely speak the truth. And always remember—the owl is watching.